James Guttman: 0:14

Hi Pod, I am Dad. He's not just Hi Dad, he's my dad, james Gutman. Folks, it's james gutman, it's high pod, I'm dad. Welcome back to another edition of the podcast. It is april, is april the 4th, it is autism awareness month. It's also autism acceptance month, it is autism appreciation month and it is high pod, I'm dad.

James Guttman: 0:41

Thank you for finding me on any of the streaming services and hipodomdadcom, all the archives. It's a domain. So, yeah, bookmark, like, subscribe, all the good stuff you're supposed to do to podcasts. Do that to this podcast and come back every single Friday, thank you. Autism Appreciation Month I like the sound of that. I also like the sound of Autism Acceptance Month I like the sound of that. I also like the sound of Autism Acceptance Month. I like the sound of Autism Awareness Month.

James Guttman: 1:08

And the reason why I'm mentioning all that is because, as the father of a nonverbal son 14, 14, sounds so old I've known for a while how overrated words can be. And whenever we say that, whenever we go, words are overrated as, like a parent like me, people think that it's kind of like a tongue-in-cheek. You know, it's not a big deal. He doesn't speak Like I'm trying to convince myself and I'm trying to make it out. Like you know, we don't really need words, but, to be honest with you guys, we don't need words and I'll tell you why. Because one of the craziest things is talking about my son, who is nonverbal, requires language that causes conflict just by being language.

James Guttman: 1:52

For example, I always say my child with autism. That's how I refer to Lucas having autism. I don't say autistic, I'm not offended by autistic, I'm not. I look at it like Lucas is not just autism, right? Lucas has other characteristics, other things about him. So to say he is autistic is to, for me, paint him with a big brush, right? Not saying that's even what it truly is. Just how I see it and how I feel it when I say it.

James Guttman: 2:22

When I say with autism, I mean well, first of all, he's my son with autism, because, before anything, he's my son and he has autism, right? So that's how I say it. Some people completely the opposite. It's not. You know, with autism implies that he has something but he doesn't have it. He is I got it and that's cool and I'm cool with it, and I've always been cool with that kind of stuff, like language and how we talk to each other.

James Guttman: 2:47

I love writing, right, I've always loved English. I love writing, I love words. I think it's amazing how we can say some of the things we say in the ways that we say them, how we can paint pictures with our words, how we can find ways to discuss things, how there's different ways to look at different phrases. So I'm cool with however you want to put it, as long as you're not doing it and saying what you're saying to be offensive or to be provocative. For the sake of it, I'm cool with it. Say whatever you want, but people will fight about it and people will get upset about it. And that happens every April, which always blows my mind. Because here we are, we're in the midst of a month dedicated to people like my son, not just people like my son, but people across the whole spectrum. Lucas is Lucas right. He's nonverbal, he has autism, he has life skills that he still has to work on and things like that.

James Guttman: 3:39

There's some people who have autism and it affects them completely different. You know, maybe it's a social thing, maybe it's a matter of having to have things done a certain way, being particular about something, obsessing about a particular thing. You know, and I see threads in everyone I've ever met who has autism certain things that I get. I can meet somebody who is, however you want to put it, high functioning whatever the phrase is who comes to me and starts telling me about something in their life that they're very excited about, whether it's a TV show or music or something, and I listen to them and I get information. It's such a great thing, and I see that in Lucas on a different level. Lucas loves his videos, and when Lucas loves something, he's happy about it, he wants to share it, he wants to show you his love for it, and that, to me, is one of the things about having autism. That's kind of a common thing across all spectrums, right, but you will find people who will stand against each particular aspect of having autism, people who will resent high functioning people, people who don't see it as something that my son has. It's a battle, and there's no better way to show this battle than with autism. Fill in the blank month, right.

James Guttman: 4:52

Autism awareness. That was the first one, right, this is something it was always linked to. You know autism speaks. I know they have. People have issues with that, but above everything, the idea that you have to be aware of autism. To somebody who lives their whole life with autism is, at its heart, something that could be offensive. I get that. I totally get it. This is who I am. Why do you have to be aware of it?

James Guttman: 5:24

Now, me as the father of a boy who has autism, like Lucas does, a boy who will shout out in a restaurant, a boy who will clap loudly in a quiet place, I want there to be autism awareness. I want people to be aware that there's people like my son, so that we're at, like you know, a somewhat quiet thing. We're waiting in line at the DMV or whatever, and he shouts out. People don't stare or be like what's wrong with that kid. They know that's autism. I'm aware of that. That's fine. Everyone's okay with it. And as long as he's not disturbing anyone which has always been my thing as a parent, right? My son has autism. If he claps loudly while we're standing in line in a loud place, don't stare at him. It is what it is. Man, you're loud, he's loud, we're loud. Now, if we're in a quiet place, it's my job to kind of calm him down, get him out of there. I try to be supportive of everyone around us but in the absence of that, being unable sometimes to do that, autism awareness is for families like mine. In the absence of that, being unable sometimes to do that, autism awareness is for families like mine.

James Guttman: 6:19

When Lucas was first diagnosed around 2012, 2013, I was terrified. I thought I was going to have to fight everybody. I was ready for it. Everybody that looked in our direction. I'm like I'm going to fight everybody who looks at my kid yeah, he's clapping, he's got autism, so what? And it rarely if ever happened back then. He's got autism, so what? And it rarely if ever happened back then. And nowadays it doesn't happen at all.

James Guttman: 6:40

Why Autism awareness? So, yeah, I get it. You might like autism acceptance better, but to me, autism awareness, there's a place for it. Autism acceptance Totally on board with that too Doesn't affect my son, right, and I'll tell you why.

James Guttman: 6:57

You can't help but accept Lucas and, to be honest with you, lucas doesn't care if you accept him. This is one of the things I love about my son Like he just doesn't care, like you don't have to let him play with you. He's doing his own thing. You know He'll hang out with you. If you're nice to him, he'll be nice to you. He wants people to be nice to him, but if you're not, he can take your leave, go away. Whatever, he'll help with you. He doesn't get like that. He doesn't get resentful. I've never seen him really be angry at a specific person. He's not like that. That's cool.

James Guttman: 7:29

That said, I know people who have autism who could benefit from autism acceptance, whether it's in the workplace, whether it's at school. People who want to live within society and want to be accepted for who they are. Lucas, he doesn't care. He doesn't need to be in society. It's on me. I'm trying to get him in. I'm trying to get him to want to be a part of society. If you accept him, if you don't accept him, that's on you. He's cool, like that.

James Guttman: 7:55

That said, I can recognize the importance of autism acceptance. Right, we all should be able to do this. This is one of the things that, as a parent who especially needs a child, as a parent to a boy with autism, a nonverbal son, I wish we all understood. Just because autism affects a family differently than mine doesn't mean that I should only want to focus on my son during autism month, right? So I'm good with that. Autism acceptance. It's huge, it's a big thing. It helps a lot of people For me, and this is the reason why this is the reason why my book is dedicated to this. It's the reason why I've written about this. It's why I pushed this idea.

James Guttman: 8:35

Autism appreciation, that's the thing that goes across all the spectrum, right Like it's a matter of understanding that, whether someone's high functioning, whether someone struggles with life skills, whether someone's verbal or nonverbal, there are certain parts of autism that are beautiful for a person's personality that are beautiful for a person's personality. I've seen honesty from people with autism, whether they're verbal and will tell you things and just be very open about everything. Or a boy like my son, who's honest with who he is, with his emotions, with his wants. I've said it before Lucas wants pirate booty. He wants pirate booty. He'll ask you for this snack. He's not like the kind of person that will then turn around afterwards. But I didn't really want that. I took that just to make you feel better, because I knew that you wanted to get rid of it and I knew that you didn't want to eat it. So he doesn't do that man, he just eats the pirate booty. He'll ask for more. He's all right, and when he's done with it, he just pushes it away. It's like a piece of crap. You come to him with stuff. You know what I mean. I'll make him a meal and I'll be like, look, I made you that. I'm all excited. I'm like, here, you want to eat it, get I don't know.

James Guttman: 9:54

And for me, that's the cornerstone, that's autism appreciation, that's what I love about it and that's for me, what this month really is. We can call it all different things awareness, acceptance but across the entire thing, it's about appreciating the people who are in our lives who have autism. And I'll tell you why you should do that. Because if you go online and April comes around and you find families of people with autism, they all will tell you about autism awareness and autism acceptance. Because all of us know how wonderful the people in our lives who have autism are and we're also aware of sometimes how hard it is for other people outside of that circle to get to know them. So this is our time. This is April. This is the time where we tell people this is who we have in know them. So this is our time. This is April. This is the time where we tell people this is who we have in our lives. You should know my kid. He's awesome, that's what I do, so I share, I tell people and I want them to appreciate him, so hopefully you do.

James Guttman: 10:44

All of my blogs are usually about that right this week and the reason why I brought this up. I mentioned both Autism Acceptance Month and Autism Awareness in my posts. Both of them did talk about appreciation as well, but I wrote on Monday about why Autism Acceptance Month hits different in our family, wrote a little bit about how the idea of autism acceptance in my household meant getting my nonverbal son to accept us, to have him want to be a part of our lives and the things that we do, and that was important. And the other one, autism. Autism awareness starts with seeing my son, not labeling him. I talk about something I've talked about from day one the whole superpower, superhero thing which you know, and I just told you I just went on about autism appreciation how wonderful my son is because of autism Don't make him a superhero. Yeah, it makes him a great human being. And by the same token, I also don't refer to him as being disabled and these different things that sometimes come off overly negative. My son is my son. He has struggles and he has triumphs and I'm by his side for the whole thing and I appreciate him every step of the way, and if you have someone like him in your life, I know you do too, and that does it for me. Guys, thank you so much for joining me. Be back.

James Guttman: 11:50

Hiblogcom monday, wednesday new blog it's been going on forever. Hi pod on dad back here next friday on every streaming service. Go out and pre-order. Hi world I'm dad. Uh, how far this can journey, from autism awareness to acceptance to appreciation. That is available on amazon. It's in stores in june, but you can get it reserved now. Check it out, I'm really I'm so proud of it, so I really want you guys to check it out. Follow me on social media. Hi, james Gutman. Hi, james Gutman H-I. I'll see you guys next time. Until then, bye, james Gutman. Saying be well, bye podcast. I'm out so so I'll see you next time.